Life lessons · Personal growth



Hello beautiful people, long time no blogpost. Work has been intense this past few weeks, but thankfully things have returned to normal now and I’m back.
For a while, I’ve been confused about the format to use for this post. At first, I wanted it to take the form of a letter but it didn’t turn out how I planned. I then decided to freestyle and allow it take its own form. Since I love to teach, the post naturally took the form of a lecture. Please stick around and enjoy.
Recently, I turned twenty three and I started to think of the lessons I have learnt in the past three years. The last 3 years have been a roller coaster ride for me, I had many highs and lows during this period and I would like to share 5 important lessons I’ve learnt and I feel would be valuable for all:
1. Avoid comparison: This might sound cliché but it is true. It is something I have to remind myself of over and over again. Comparison is an easy route to discontent, unhappiness, feelings of resentment and even envy. Sometimes I fall into the trap of comparing myself to some my peers, it just spirals downward from there and I end up feeling depressed. However, I remind myself that no two lives are the same and my journey is different from theirs. On the flip side, it is also easy to compare yourself with people you seem to be better than. This is also potentially dangerous because it can lead to complacency, you feel like there is no need to work harder or to do better after all you are better than someone else. This isn’t saying it’s wrong to look at what people are doing right and try to imitate that or to ask people for advice. It’s just about getting the right balance.
2. Whatever you have to do, do it well: It doesn’t matter what it is; cooking, writing, a job, academics, blogging, relationships… anything. It’s imperative to always do your best in whatever you are doing because you might not get that chance anymore. There are few things worse than the feelings of guilt and regret that comes with knowing you didn’t put in your best efforts and having that opportunity forever lost. I learnt this lesson the hard way but I have also learnt not to beat myself up over it. I look for ways of remedying the situation and if there are none, I learn from it and do better next time. This brings me to my next point
3. Don’t cry over spilled milk: It’s okay to feel regret over a past action or misdeed but lingering over it doesn’t help. It can become an obstacle, preventing you from seeing better opportunities. It can weigh down your heart and your senses and tie you down to the past. It is important to examine past actions, see what you could have done better and try to do better in future. However, you need to avoid constantly beating yourself up over it, that simply does not help anybody.
4. You are who you associate with: It is said that humans are like sponges, we absorb whatever surrounds us. We tend to absorb the values, principles, behaviour, mannerisms and the mental attitude of our close associates. This is why it is important to choose friends wisely. Having friends that are content with mediocrity can make you become complacent, you never get to reach your full potential because there is no one to encourage and assist you in doing so. All your friends do not necessarily have to be in your age group, friends can be from any level: old, young, married, single, male or female. Having a diverse group of friends can help you in different ways. However, it is necessary to choose friends that have similar values, friends that encourage you to strive for excellence, friends that build you up and not tear you down, that help you develop yourself and that you can have fun with too. It is also necessary to be a good friend to others, it is not enough to want good qualities in friends without having them in you.
5. Things don’t always go according to plan: This is not an easy lesson to accept but that’s just the way it is. Sometimes, despite your best efforts, things may not go according to plan. When this happens, instead of feeling helpless and frustrated, I have found that it is better to make the best of the situation or try to formulate another plan to see if it works better. It can be a bitter pill to swallow, but you need to admit to yourself that there are certain things out of your control. Seemingly minor things can throw a very elaborate and well thought out plan off balance and there is nothing anybody can do about it. It’s just left to you to move on.
These are just few of the life lessons I have learned over time. I have not fully absorbed all these lessons yet, it’s a work in progress, I still have a long way to go. Hopefully, I’ll get there and so will you. Thanks for reading. Please read, comment, like and share.



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